A refashioned German military vehicle that costs as much as a house
The creamsicle-orange paint of the most recent G63 tester to hit our fleet proved irresistible to all but the most curmudgeonly on staff, or the most self-conscious. Where a Mercedes-AMG G63 in a predictable silver -- or, worse, matte silver -- would’ve immediately planted more of us firmly in the “no way I’m driving that bro-dozer” camp, the whimsical pumpkin hue transformed the former military truck into the hippest carriage Cinderella could’ve wished for -- short of an actual giant squash on wheels.
The monster motor under the hood is almost beside the point, too, despite its 563 hp and weirdly disconcerting ability to propel this 5,624-pound brick-shaped hunk of steel in near-sports car fashion. Mercedes claims 5.3 seconds for 0-60; we have no reason to disagree. The growl, too, on startup and at full twin-turbo song, is addictive, as is the white-knuckle feeling of pushing such a tall, top-heavy vehicle so exuberantly, thereby tempting the center-of-gravity and handling Fates to tip you over on every corner.
No, the point of a G-Class in this clown-paint, AMG guise is to amuse. And for those who can afford to shell out $162K on such a diversion, well, I don’t begrudge them a whit. Its “timelessly modern design,” as Mercedes dubs its slab-sided, flat-glass styling, adds to its charm, as does an interior that feels, in its bones, at least three generations old but with a thick layer of tech and "luxury" slathered all over (note: There's an all new interior coming with a new G-Class at the 2018 Detroit auto show). The concessions to modern automotive conveniences are few. It's a throwback in big and little ways, from the tumble-forward second-row seats to the push-button exterior door handles (on doors that close with a super-satisfying and solid click) and the console-mounted shifter (in a Mercedes!).
It's a nostalgic vehicle big on whimsy. That it also moves like stink is a bonus.
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